The Final Chapter

Oh my little blog, how I have abandoned you this semester. Have you missed me these past four (!!!) months?? I'm sorry to have left you hanging for so long; here's what's been happening since we last connected. School has been over for a few weeks now. The day after school ended, I turned 27, and the day after THAT, I did a bit of traveling trough the south and in Malaysia. But now I'm back in Bangkok, and fly home in exactly one week. The one word I can think of to describe how I feel about it all is "bittersweet."

Things About Going Home I Am Amped About: - seeing family and friends - staying in my actual house - eating loads of American food (helloooo Chipotle and Chopt) - Thanksgiving and Christmas - driving a car - being able to flush toilet paper - SWEATER WEATHER - being able to communicate with everyone around me - free TV (thanks mom and dad) - real delicious home cooked meals (BIG thanks mom) - going for a run without fear of heat stroke or getting hit by a car

Things About Thailand That I Will Miss: - super cheap eveything - wai-ing people and saying sawatdee kaaaa (I may just keep this up) - getting an awesome massage for under $10 whenever the mood strikes - fresh fruit all over the damn place and the SMOOTHIES!! Passionfruit and pineapple smoothies, you are my kryptonite. - wearing flip flops every damn day - practicing my Thai skills on the reg - having every second of every day be a cultural experience - commuting via motorsai - the beaches <3333 - my adorable students and my coteachers, and all the new friends I've made - all the super friendly Thai people - hopping on a plane and spending the weekend in a different country

It's sort of a "damned if you do, damned if you don't" situation. But while I have loved (and sometimes hated, let's be honest) life in Thailand, and the country will always hold a special place in my heart, it's nearly time to close this chapter in my life and move onto the next challenge. And so, Thailand, I say to you, "Khob khun mak ka, and sawatdee ka."

My Time is Running Out

Cue the Muse!!! [youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7JLfCCGOers&w=560&h=315]

Sidenote: this song has nothing to do with this post, except the title. But it's a good song. So there's that.

So here we are, a month into second semester, and this is when I begin freaking out.

This is what I feel like:

This is what I WANT to feel like:

I have only three months until my contract is up, and my time in Thailand comes to an end. THREE MONTHS?! Where the hell did all the time go? Back in February, I was thinking, "Oh, if I don't get to it now, I'll just do it second semester." Well, second semester is rapidly going away.. we're already near midterms! There's still so many things I want to do and places to see, and I get anxious thinking about not being able to do it all. I have to keep reminding myself to be realistic and that there's no feasible way to see everything in Southeast Asia, or even just Thailand, that I want to this time around. I have to prioritize what I really want to do, and then the rest I'll just have to save for a return trip.

Despite this reality check, it doesn't help me not feel depressed about it. I'm sort of over the whole teaching thing already, and I'm totally stoked to go home and see my friends, family, and the East Coat (Beast Coast for life!), but I'm not done traveling yet, dammit! I MUST SEE IT ALL!!! When else am I going to be so close to so many places? The Malaysian beaches, the Singaporean nightlife, the Laotian rivers.. they're all within my grasp! I imagine this conversation playing out when I get home:

Random person: So did you get to see XYZ while you were there? Me: (getting sad again) No, I didn't, but I really wanted to! Random person: Oh man, I can't believe you were so close and didn't go!!! Me: >>>>>:(((((( (shoots lasers out of my eyes at random person)

This is where I am mentally right now, a big ol' mess of alternately wanting to go and wanting to stay, and it's driving me bonkers.  I've been keeping pretty busy with school, aerobic dance class (my knee despises me right now), Game of Thrones binges, and weekends in Bangkok, so the time seems to have gotten way from me. We have a 4 day weekend coming up in July, and then I think we will have another one in August, but then at the end of September, I'm done! Time certainly does fly by when you're having fun. And not having enough time to jetset around this beautiful corner of the world is not a bad problem to have. Nothing that a massage and a gin and tonic can't solve, anyway...

Live Through a Coup? Check.

Disclaimer: I am not an expert in Thai politics; this is merely a summary of the current state of affairs as I understand it as a foreigner living in Thailand. This is not my fight, so I do not endorse either side. I am a mere observer. 

As I write this, it's Friday around noon, and I'm at home, not at school. Why? Because yesterday around 5 PM, the Thai military announced it was taking over the government. A coup! How exciting. But how does this affect me personally? Well, there's a countrywide curfew in place from 10 PM - 5 AM, and they closed all of the schools until Sunday. So uh, thanks for the 3 day weekend? In Salaya, life goes on as usual. I am safe, and my friends who live in Bangkok are safe as well. As a political science major, it's a pretty interesting time to be living here.

If you're new to Thai politics, you may be wondering, "WHOA GUY, what do you mean there's a COUP? What the deuce is going on?!" To answer that, let's back up a little, to when I was brand new to Thailand. Almost the entire time that I've been here (6 out of the 7 months), there have been anti-government protests (the yellow shirts) going on, mostly in Bangkok. They believe the government, led by now-ousted Prime Minister Yingluck Shinawatra, is corrupt (read more in detail -- older articles but decent background info: PolicyMic, CNN). Her brother is Thaksin Shinawatra, a business tycoon and former PM who is in self-imposed exile abroad because he was found guilty of corruption charges. This is a very simplified version of what's going on from a farang, but essentially the Bangkok elite have accused the Shinawatras and their political party of buying votes (among other abuses) in the rural provinces (especially the northeast) of Thailand, which is where they get all of their support. They are protesting the corruption, and they want to set up a new government.

Meanwhile, the pro-government supporters (the red shirts) have their own counter-protests, and so for months now they have been demonstrating back and forth trying to change the government. Usually, the protests are peaceful, but there have been incidents where it has turned violent and people have died. Then, earlier this month, Yingluck was ousted from her post by a court ruling, and a caretaker PM stepped in. This past Tuesday, we woke up and found out that the military had imposed martial law overnight, claiming that it was necessary to "restore order" and it was not a coup. That lasted about 2.5 days, as yesterday afternoon, they announced that this was in fact a coup, and the military had taken over the government.

Not long after I found out about the coup, I went to dinner with my next door neighbor, who is an officer in the Thai navy (another story for another time). The dude likes to talk, and he couldn't stop talking about the coup, understandably. What was interesting was his perspective on it, especially as part of the Thai military. He said that the coup was a good thing, that the military guys are very smart and "will fix everything." He said that the problem was the "uneducated" people who were corrupt and accepted money from Thaksin. "The educated people know better, but the uneducated people do not think, they do not know." He also said that coups were normal in Thailand (?!?!), which actually isn't too far from the truth, since the last one was in 2006. The US State Department and other Western countries are issuing statements condemning the coup and its effect on democracy, but this naval officer, a highly educated Thai person, was in support of the coup, and firmly believes it will help solve the country's problems, and prevent a civil war. Just goes to show that there are always going to be widely different opinions on how to go about solving crises. It remains to be seen where this coup will lead the country, but I'll be here, watching and listening.

GSEAS, Part 2: Vietnam - Nha Trang & Saigon

After just over 2 months on the road, I am finally back in Salaya, and just beginning my second semester of teaching. Instead of trying to sum up most of the trip (post-Hoi An), which included trips to southern Vietnam, Cambodia, Malaysia, Indonesia, and Hong Kong, I've decided to take more of a photo essay approach using some of my favorite shots. Let's take a peek at the rest of my time in Vietnam, from Nha Trang south to Saigon and the Mekong River Delta..

Next up, country #2 on the G.S.E.A.S., Cambodia..

Popping In

Can you just "pop in" to your own blog? I think you can. Anyway, I'm doing just that so I inform all of you loyal readers (hi Dad) that I'm working on posts about the rest of my G.S.E.A.S. and about being back at school! Which just started! Yeah! In the meantime, here's a terrifying owl in Bangkok:

Great Southeast Asian Sojourn, Part 1: Vietnam

March 1 marked the beginning of our summer vacation, or what we in the Salaya Club have dubbed our "Great Southeast Asian Sojourn." We had a few bumps on the way (missed flight, lost baggage, lost credit cards), but somehow we made it to Hanoi. And what a city! I seriously love that place. The vibe is totally different than Thailand, and more what I was looking for when I moved to Asia. I could feel a certain buzz and energy in the air that I don't sense when I'm in Bangkok, or even Chiang Mai really. The people were super friendly; more friendly I think than in Thailand. Land of Smiles, Schmand of Schmiles! Also, I enjoyed the food a lot more. Maybe I'll move to Vietnam in October?? 

Since this is Vietnam, the city has a bit of a French influence which you can see in the architecture, which is very pretty, and the presence of bread! The cool rainy weather was a nice break from the insufferable Thai heat, though our feet were pretty disgusting after walking around in flip flops all day. Vietnam is also cheaper than Thailand (hooray communism?!), though using the Vietnamese dong makes for some good jokes. 20,000 dong is about one dollar. Seriously, the jokes write themselves. Since it is communist, you will see that red color all around (the Vietnamese flag is red with a yellow star), propaganda souvenirs, and bars shut down at midnight, or rather the whole city seems to, but there's underground bars and clubs that rage all night, if you know where to find them.

Also, the cultural drinking experience in Hanoi is the "bia hoi," which is local beer that they brew daily. There's a small street/corner in the city that has all of these little streetside bars (bar meaning a 10x10 patch of sidewalk) that brew their own cheap beer (maybe 5,000 VND per drink) each day. The batch is new everyday, and has to be drunk that day. It was an awesome way to experience Hanoi nightlife, and mingle with locals. I only wish that I had made it there more than once. 

What it all comes down to is that I love Hanoi, and would live there in a heartbeat. Do I really have to go back to Thailand? Thankfully not yet...

After Hanoi, we overnight bused it to Hoi An, a sleepy beach town. It was cute and quaint, but I didn't find much there to entertain me. I think it's going to be hard for each successive place to live up to the standard that Hanoi set. After two nights in Hoi An, and another overnight bus, we are currently in Nha Trang, where my grandaddy Lillard was stationed in the war, and near where Autumn's dad was at Cam Ranh Bay. Tomorrow we will leave for Ho Chi Minh City, or Saigon, where we will spend a couple days before heading for Cambodia. One country (almost) down, three more to go! 

Feels Like I Only Go Backwards

It's been exactly 3 months (and one day) since I arrived in Thailand. Everything I've read about culture shock says that this is around the time when the initial honeymoon feeling wears off, and the shock really begins. For me though, I think it came in reverse. I spent probably the first month and a half in Thailand really frustrated and overwhelmed. Since I arrived a few days late, I felt like I had to play catch-up to my fellow teachers. Though they had only been here a couple days longer than me, they had already made friends, explored Bangkok some, and were picking up the language. I felt like a huge fish out of water. In retrospect, I think I was still pretty stressed from my whole "stuff getting stolen" ordeal and being thrown into the middle of orientation didn't help much.

When we finally got to Salaya, it wasn't much better. Just trying to get groceries was a huge undertaking, and my normal comforts and stress relievers were nowhere in sight. I consider myself a pretty adaptable and patient person, but this was challenging me like nothing else before. There were a lot of tearful days where I thought to myself, "Holy shit, did I just make the biggest mistake of my life? What the hell am I doing here?! I am clearly more of Western European gal."  If you had told me 3 or 4 years ago that I would make the decision to move to Asia for a year, I would have laughed so hard and said, "Yeah, okay, and then I'll become pope after that." Asia had never interested me as much as Europe, so when Thailand wasn't fitting perfectly, I thought maybe my year-plus-long plan to move here had been a dream or a delusion. Though there were good days or moments that validated the move, they didn't come around as often as I might have liked.

Fast forward to Month 3, and I am finally feeling more comfortable here. The smells don't bother me as much, I can navigate the market and buy food, and Thai sounds much more like a language as opposed to just gibberish, not to mention I can catch a word here and there!  Sure, there are some days where all I want is a huge bowl of guacamole and a Fenway Frank, but the the homesickness is not nearly so acute.

Though three months doesn't seem like that much, especially since my contract is for a year, we are only about six weeks away from the end of the semester (and summer vacation!!). The six-month teachers are winding down their stay here, while I feel like I am just hitting my stride. At one month, I was afraid of being honest when someone asked me, "So, do you like Thailand?" But ask me now, and I can say that though it took a while and the relationship is still complicated, I do.

Old Enough to Party

Figured it was about time to check in and post another update! It's been just over 2 months since I've been in Thailand. On the one hand, it feels like I've been here for AGES, especially with December being such a whirlwind. On the other, I also feel like a newbie here, and I still have so much do.. which it is true! It's also weird being here during the holidays. Sure, there's Christmas decorations everywhere and Tesco is stuffed to the gills with gift baskets, but it also just feels like a regular week. I still have to go to school and teach (ok, this week it's just Christmas songs YAY), and I'm not doing any of my normal Christmas traditions. More so than ever, being away from home for the holidays really makes you realize that being with your family is what makes the holidays FEEL like the holidays (cue the world's smallest violin). MISS YA, FAMALAM. BUT NEVER FEAR! This holiday season I'm switching it up. Sure, we might be ordering pizza for Christmas dinner (OH YOU JEALOUS HUH), but come Friday afternoon, we will be headed to Koh Pha Ngan for a full week, and spending New Year's Eve at the infamous Full Moon party. Basically, I'm not torn up about it. This is when I break out my "chicka chicka yeahhhhhh" dance.

When I surface, I shall be tanner, drunker, and happier. See ya on the flip side, los interwebs.

Tourist vs. Resident

Before I left the U.S., I must have answered the question "What are you doing?" a million times. When I told people that I was teaching in Thailand, that usually prompted some response detailing their familiarity with the country: "OH! I went on vacation there last year!" "I know a girl who taught there!" "My best friend's cousin was in Bangkok once.. I think.."

My automatic reply was "So, did you/they/he/she like it?" and the overwhelming answers were YES YES A THOUSAND TIMES YES. People adored it, they had the most amazing time, what an incredible place. "You are going to LOVE IT there!!!" Needless to say, this led to a build up in my mind of Thailand being a paradise -- the most BALLIN place on Earth -- and questioning why I didn't make the move earlier.

Well, after 6 weeks, the jury is still out on whether I love it or not, but I have come to the (probably obvious) realization, that the experience of visiting the country for a couple weeks is polar opposite from living here and engaging in daily Thai life. When people come for vacation, they visit the historical temples, chill on the beach for a few days, and explore gritty Bangkok. They get the briefest taste of what Thailand is all about, and it's specially curated for the tourist and their delicate sensibilities. What they don't see is the life that regular Thais lead.

Daily life in Thailand involves dirt, litter, and stray dogs.. all in massive numbers. And when it's hot and humid (which is, uh, every day), it STANKS. I have to ride a motorbike to school 5 minutes down the street because there's no sidewalk and I would probably get hit by a car flying down the four lane road if I tried to walk on the side. When it rains, it floods because there's terrible drainage everywhere, so good luck getting anywhere.

Traffic is pure insanity: I am talking bumper to bumper any time of day, any day of the week. Recently, it has been even worse (how is it possible?!) because of the enormous protests in Bangkok.. but that's another post for another day. School has its own set of frustrations; let's just say the Thai school system makes American schools look like finely tuned machines filled with perfect angels.

Tourists relaxing at a resort don't have to battle with the language day in and day out; they don't have to deal with the simple task of buying a movie ticket turning into a ten minute ordeal involving five movie theater employees (true story). They don't find themselves standing in the aisle at Tesco Lotus, staring at the shelf and trying to figure out which box is dish soap and which one is laundry detergent.

And frankly, they don't have to contemplate a run-of-the-mill Thai menu. This is not your American pad thai, y'all. I'm talking fermented fish and other crazy stuff. I will admit that this stuff may appeal to some, and I am a lifelong picky eater, but after a while you just find yourself pining for a grilled cheese or a steak. In an upcoming post I will compare just how big the difference is between the menus from real Thai restaurants and ones in America.

This probably sounds like one big bitch-fest, and in a way, it is. I've been frustrated with a lot of the things here (yay culture shock!) but it's all part of the process. There are, however, plenty of things about this country that are incredible and that I enjoy. I love how friendly Thais can be, I love being able to travel on the weekends and do some pretty sweet stuff, and all the while, I'm having an experience like no other.

I'm still learning how to navigate Thailand, and discovering what I like about it. Really getting to know a place doesn't happen overnight, and it will probably take a couple more months, so until then, I will just have to practice saying "mai bpen rai" when I really want to say something else.. and maybe take up meditation. For real this time.

This is just to say...

... that there will be some good blog posts coming up! Yep, a blog post about future blog posts. How meta. I've just returned from a crazy 5 days in Chiang Mai and the past couple weeks at school have been busy, so I haven't been able to write at all, but I have a few things I do want to write about knocking around inside my head. You can expect posts on the following:

• American Thai food vs. Thailand Thai food. Yes, they are different. 
• Life in Salaya (our town)
• the Thai personality (generally speaking) and customs /habits
• Perceptions of a country as a tourist vs. as a resident

I might also delve into the underbelly of Thai society at some point, mostly because an incident at our apartment building that happened not more than a couple of hours ago spurred me to do some Googling that revealed some startling information. 

Keep an eye out for one of these posts this weekend, hopefully! 

"Teacha, Teacha!"

We are nearing the end of our first full week of classes, so I thought I would take this opportunity of having cooperative WiFi to talk about my school a bit. My school is called Kanchanapisek Wittayalai Nakhon Pathom School (KPN or Kanchana for short). There are 9 affiliate Kanchanapisek schools around the country, so ours is distinguished by putting the province, Nakhon Pathom, in the name. It's a "royal project" school, so it attracts the best students from around the area. Thai secondary (Mathayom) schools are divided into levels M1 - M6, with M1 being 7th grade, and M6 being 12th grade. I am currently teaching 2 levels: M3 (so freshman) and M5 (juniors). I have 10 M3 classes, and 8 M5 classes, and I only see each class once a week. Since each class has about 25-30 students (maybe a few more), that's a lot of kids whose names I am definitely not going to remember at all.. I am not even going to try.

What I do want to learn is some of my students' nicknames, because these things are HILARIOUS. Sometimes they will have a short Thai name, but often times they (or their parents I think) have picked random English words. So I have students whose nicknames are Champ, Cartoon, Ice, Boat, Best, View, and Toffy. Some other teachers have other ridiculous names, such as Oil, Pond, Curve, and Biggy. I am not sure what the reasoning is for the choices, but it's amusing nonetheless.

Even though I have told my students my name, the title of this post is one phrase I hear from Thai students constantly. "Teacha, teacha! How old are you?" "Teacha, where you come from?" "Teacha, how long are you in Thailand?" These are the tame, expected questions though; often they like to get a little more personal, or downright absurd. Some of my favorite exchanges so far:

Male Student: Teacha, do you have a boyfriend? Me: No, I don't. Student: I am single. Me: I don't date students.

Male Student #2 (it's always the boys): Teacha, why do you have light skin? Me (a little flabbergasted): Why do you have dark skin???? (That one was a hit with the students.)

Female student: Teacha, what color are your eyes? Me: They are hazel, which means green and brown. Female student: Oooohhh suay, suay [beautiful]! (Kid, you get an A from teacha.)

Sigh… kids are kids no matter what side of the world you're on. I know I am probably forgetting some silly student stories (there's a new one everyday), but that just means I will have to same them for another post. Stay tuned, and sawadee ka!